Co-parenting offers a lot of benefits, for both you and your children. Co-parenting after a divorce helps to give your kids a greater sense of security in an uncertain time. It also offers them an excellent role model on how to compromise and work out your differences amicably. However, making joint decisions with someone who you've been disagreeing with on a regular basis is often easier said than done.
Tips for successful co-parenting
1. Check your ego at the door. As difficult as it can be, it's important to realize that co-parenting isn't about you, your spouse or your individual needs. It's about your kids. The more you can step back from your differences and focus on your children, the more successful you'll be.
2. Maintain consistency as much as possible. For co-parenting to provide the security you want for your kids, it's vital that you keep to the co-parenting structure as much as possible. That way your kids will be able to count on seeing each of you at set times. Not having to be anxious about when they are going to see their father and/or mother next lets your kids be able to concentrate on kid-like things, such as homework and after-school activities.
3. Be flexible. As important as it is to keep the structure of the joint custody arrangement as much as possible, it's also vital to be able to roll with the inevitable change when necessary. You or your spouse may get sick, have to go out of town for business unexpectedly or have to care for a sick parent out of town. Kids, too, may have conflicts with the set schedule, such as wanting to attend a school function or go out of town with a friend on vacation. For co-parenting to work in the long run, it's essential to be able to handle this unexpected changes.
4. Remember that you can't tell your kids "I love you" too often. Even the best co-parenting arrangement comes with uncertainty for your kids. Combat that anxiety by telling your kids you love them. You can't give this message to your kids too many times.
While co-parenting isn't the right decision for every family facing divorce, a shared custody arrangement offers a myriad of benefits for your kids. To make it work, you just need to be flexible and willing to compromise, check your egos at the door and try to stick with the custody schedule as much as possible.
To learn more, contact a professional like Joanna Cobleigh Esq with any questions you have.
Share19 February 2015
Divorce is never an easy situation. For fathers, it can be even more stressful because it is more difficult to obtain custody of the kids. Having gone through a divorce myself, I learned quite a bit about the additional steps that fathers should go through to ensure that they have a fair chance at gaining custody of the kids. My site is filled with the tips and advice that I received from my lawyer and other fathers that have gone through the same thing. Hopefully, what you learn on my site will help you achieve the outcome that you hope for.
